Posts by Onion

    Is this from the new planet of the apes? I don't like the new hipster vibe they trying to give it. Put the monkeys back on horses and give em the old school leather armer

    Got a new book that I wrote. It's a high-staked thriller that involves the crew of a US nuclear submarine.


    Here's the story


    A US Nuclear sub goes and embarks on a 1 year mission. After three months at sea the coronavirus happens but they are unaware because they are not allowed to talk with the outside world for 1 year.


    On board, a sailor named Hopscotch is sleeping. He wakes in the night nite not able to breath. After being rushed to sick bay that motherfucker died. No one thought much of it so they just stuck his body into a torpedo shoot and fired his ass into the giant garbage dump that is the ocean. ( I added an environmental message to my book too to help fight global warming)


    Three days later, Captain Honeycut is thinking about Hopscotch. "Hmmm. That guy just died so fast" and he orders a full optopsy on him. Captain Honeycut has been fighting a dry cough for a week, so he bunks down for the night with his lover, Japson.


    The next day Hoptscotch's optopsy comes in. The doctor says In a stern voice. "Get Honecut"


    I won't tell you all the whole fucking story but the crew all gets coronavirus and they all die, except gay lover, Japson but he has AIDS.


    Japson is forced to run the nuclear submarine for another 9 months by himself. He can't surface or call anybody.


    That's why the book is called Dead Man's Crew. It's because he's running a ship full of dead guys.


    (It's not all gloom and death though. There's a funny scene where Japson positions a bunch of dead guys at a table and has a big Thanksgiving meal with them.)



    Japson has no idea if the virus is contagious. Could it spead to the outside world?


    He thinks about if he should fire his nukes at China.


    The book is a wild rollercoaster ride of thrillers and emotions.



    You'll have to read it to find out how it ends.

    this thread will commence a another of my crazy popular music threads. This one is free to join like my other popular music thread but this one is about the words that are stupid.


    Why don't I go ahead and start off with one. K.


    Smokey Robinson My Girl


    words.


    I've got sunshine

    On a cloudy day

    When it's cold outside

    I've got the month of May

    I guess you'd say

    What can make me feel this way?

    My girl, my girl, my girl

    Talkin' 'bout my girl

    My girl


    Okay wtf. How many girls does this clown have and which one is really his girl? He's talking about his girl talking about his girl. That's confusing to the listener. At least name the bitches so we can keep the story straight and know wtf he's talking about. Like Suzy, Suzy, talking about Jennifer.


    My conclusion. Ameture and fuck Smokey Robinson

    Kid fell 2 hundred meters into the ground, probably at 200+ mph horizontal. Turned out he had been constantly running away to 'see the world', so the parents indulged the 14 year old shit by actually TAKING him on a 'round the world' trip. WHAT does he do upon their return? Sneaks into Sydney airport, cleverly hides in wheel well compartment, (ON, a trans-Pacific flight) Even had the wheels not crushed him into goo, he he'd froze/suffocated enroute. This was a big story a few decades ago

    I traveled that way before after reading aboot BD Cooper.

    You're full of shit.


    That's Cory Smith, 29, from Two Rivers Wisconsin.

    if whot you say is true than maybe this is a ambush situation. She lied to me before to try to get my money and some dick meat. I might go anyways and see what she looking like these days. But if shes gonna ambush I don't know

    Just found I got a son. Hes 14 and his name is Pastel. Hes a artist or something is what Im told. His old lady send me his picture and wants me to be part of his life now. I do remember one chick I was nailing had a baby that lived with us for a couple years and she said ya that's Pastel.


    Now Im going to tale a buss up to Oregon and chill out with him and probably start being his dad.


    Sounds like it was a spy ship and someone got doublecrossed. I seen a show once when a ship went and got a sank Russia sub and pulled it up the bottom. The sub was running a skeleton crew because that's what the ship found inside. Then it broke in halve like a water logged turd and fell back down in the ocean so the ship sailed away again.

    okay nobody made it out of round one with a right guess. the big reveal!


    niggerface = murderface

    BsMom = tx mom

    Red ding a ling = Redwing7

    Mr no nuts - mr no game

    Shithead = airhead


    those are all funny but I have even mode sidesplitting ones coming your way.


    Here's round two of extra funny ones.


    Shittish


    Lass


    Gaydar


    Faggie

    Been awhile peeps.

    I wanna start watching movies. I'm at my uncle's house and he has cabel

    Things I know I like. Pussy violence adventure zombies and war. I like destruction and fire too. Let me know okay?