Rescued.....from shrubbery

  • And moss grows on what side of a tree?

    ‘If you’re not a liberal when you’re 25, you have no heart. If you’re not a conservative by the time you’re 35, you have no brain.’

    No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot - Mark Twain

    TWAT on 10/14/2019 :

    Lemme say that again... I don't care. If. The accusations against Trump. Are factual. Or not.

  • And moss grows on what side of a tree?

    I remember being told that when I was a kid. Spent a lot of time in the woods in Bumfuck Appalachia and I never really found that to be true.

    A dangerous ambition more often lurks behind the specious mask of zeal for the rights of the people than under the forbidden appearance of zeal for the firmness and efficiency of government. History will teach us that the former has been found a much more certain road to the introduction of despotism than the latter.

  • But back where I grew up there was nearly always a ridge in sight going NE/SW. And other places I've lived, you can generally see the sun. If you don't have either of those features... I dunno. I reckon that's what GPS is for.

    A dangerous ambition more often lurks behind the specious mask of zeal for the rights of the people than under the forbidden appearance of zeal for the firmness and efficiency of government. History will teach us that the former has been found a much more certain road to the introduction of despotism than the latter.

  • We had a soldier die of exposure here at our land nav course a few years ago. What a waste. They should have told him the fucker was fenced in. Walk in one direction until you hit the fence. Follow the fence until you get to the entrance.

  • The other sport with "city People" was called "guess where Newburgh is?".

    Apparently, People in NYC believe NYC is 75% of NY State.

    They get this blank stare when you tell them you live north of Yonkers.

    "Are ya near Yonkers?

    Albany?



    Plattsburgh???"

    Idiots.

    Look at a map.

  • I had to be rescued from Shrubbery once, I was in the beer garden out the back of Portsea Hotel for a Sunday Sesh when the urge to relieve myself of a whole bunch of beer came upon me. The beer garden at Portsea over looks Port Phillip Bay and has about a 15 foot drop to the beach out the back, which was near by and the dunny was at the other end of the building. I snuck off to a spot out of sight on the edge of the drop off and started to piss into the shrubs on it. I had been in the beer garden for quite a few hours in the sun consuming beer listening to the band and had developed sea legs, this led to a bit of a tumble off the drop. I was stopped very early by a particular shrub that was covered in 1 inch long sharp spikes which pierced me in all sorts of places including my still out cock. I was stuck in this bush for about five minutes until I could get the attention of my mates to come and get me out.

    You can identify an unknown force by firing one shot and judging the response.

    - If the unknowns respond with precise, regimented rifle fire, they are British.

    - If they respond with heavy machinegun fire, they are German.

    - If nothing happens for a few minutes, then your whole position gets leveled by artillery, they are American.

    - If they surrender, they're French.

    :littlered

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